As mentioned in the earlier post, it is the time of the year again when most people start to write and share their new year’s resolution. Everything is inter-related and provides a holistic approach to personal development.
1. Change the perfectionism
Key takeaway: “Nothing will ever be perfect, no matter how much we try.”
Things often do not happen exactly how we want them to be, no matter how much wisdom and efforts had been put into preparing and executing them. What matters most is to Think – Discuss (if required) – Take Action – Improve (on what had been done well) – Learn (from what had not been done well) – Repeat.
i. Spend a reasonable amount of time thinking through the execution plans to achieve that great idea or grand goal you have. Some questions to ask yourself or your team include “What action(s) is/are to be taken and the target outcome(s)?”, “Who is/are responsible?”, “When to start and end the action(s)?”, “How to achieve the target outcome(s)?”, “What if any undesirable thing happen?”
ii. TAKE ACTION.
iii. Be open to feedback internally and externally. All feedback is equally important but you have to weigh the pros and cons, and review your current resources/strengths/weaknesses before taking any corrective/developmental actions.
2. Change the multi-tasking habit
Key takeaway: “Being fully present and committed to one task, is indispensable.’”
Everyone has a fixed number of hours each day (please do not sacrifice rest and sleep). Spreading your attention across multiple tasks given the same amount of resources (time, energy and/or money) may risk under-performing or worse, failing in every task.
i. Identify 3 (or more if you so desire) key tasks to be accomplished each day and allocate resources accordingly.
ii. Focus and commit all attention in each task before moving to the next.
3. Change the need to control everything
Key takeaway: “The only thing you will be able to control sometimes is your attitude towards something.”
Getting too worried, concerned or affected by things which you cannot control will not help improve the situation.
i. Take negative situations or reactions beyond your control positively
ii. Focus instead on things within your control to reduce* the likelihood of undesirable outcomes
* Note: Nothing will ever be perfect
4. Change the “Say yes to everything” obligation
Key takeaway: “To accomplish your goals, you will sometimes have to say NO.”
It is easier said than done to not succumb to social, family or work pressures. However, in order to accomplish your goals, you will sometimes need to sacrifice a bit of instant gratification.
i. Allocate resources (time, energy and/or money) to spend time with your loved ones, like how you allocated them for tasks/activities which bring you closer to your goals.
ii. Say NO politely to any ad-hoc activities or demands from family, friends or colleagues if they do not support your goals.
iii. If you really have to say YES, try to fit them into your free or rest time.
5. Change the need to be liked
Key takeaway: “There is no need to justify yourself.”
For whatever goals you set out to achieve, there are bound to have supporters and cynics (or even “haters”).
i. Leverage on the positive energy from supporters and drive yourself forward.
ii. Take negative remarks/actions from cynics (or “haters”) as constructive feedback and motivation to work harder.
iii. Do not try to justify your actions and try too hard to please or gain support from everyone. Remain authentic and constantly improve.